To paraphrase from C. S. Lewis' The Problem of Pain,
Not many years ago when I was not a parent, if anyone had asked me, "Do you know how to successfully potty train a toddler." My reply would have been something like this, "No, but it can't be that hard." And the truth is that it isn't . . . for seemingly everybody else!
Following up on a recent post from Mrs. Chicken about the travails of potty training The Poo, the W and I must profess our own difficulties with our first born. The O is now three years and 10 months old. He successfully pees in the pot, stays dry through the night, and hasn't had a diaper on under his clothes in months. Yet he refuses to drop a deuce in the toilet. He'll ask for a diaper. We put it on. He closes the bathroom door and when finished, announces he's done. Together we take off his diaper and he dumps his poop into the toilet. A quick clean-up and he's back to his business--which is anything but pooping.
Now we can't say we've tried everything, but we've tried most. We've done away with his diapers, but the Happy Elf is 19 months so the O knows there's a diaper or two in the house. We've been through stickers, M&Ms, potty prizes, praise (and prayers), DVDs, competition from his younger brother . . . no dice and no deuce.
One long weekend we decided to "go for it." No diapers, no compromises. Do it on the stool or else . . . We didn't find what the "else" was. Instead the O flew into fits of rage, anger, and frustration. What should we do? Stick with it? What we experienced was out of the norm for all of us and we checked several books and websites on where to go from there. What instinct told us was to step back. He obviously wasn't ready . . . and still isn't. And that's cool. We know he'll get it. We didn't force crawling, walking, talking etc. Why force this developmental milestone? We're not sitting on the sidelines just waiting. We are encouraging, sometimes cajoling, but for us we've made our peace with poop.
We take great solace from the book Todder 411 (we bought our copy at Pages for All Ages) concerning Potty Training. They say, "Toilet training takes one day--you just have to pick the right day!"
That seems to echo a lot of the experiences we've read. "He just did it by himself." "She announced she was through with diapers." "He said he was going to use the potty because he was a big boy now."
And so we wait for that "right day" to potty train the O.
5 comments:
Like I said, this is the one time (thus far, at least) that I feel 100 percent incompetent. The Poo is insanely stubborn. I have to figure out a way to break her will without breaking her spirit. Know what I mean?
Yeah, I think ya do.
Our 4yo just recently, finally, pooped in the toilet. We tried everything...he actually ended up getting completely constipated and we had to give him medication and watch his diet. We've gone through a lot of underwear. But he finally was ready and is doing it.
Now the 2yo pretty much potty trained himself!
Watch, the elf will be fulling trained on his own before the new baby comes.
I wonder if you could talk to O and find out why he won't poop on the potty (I'm sure you have). Maybe there is some issue that you aren't thinking of. I have read in a lot of books that many kids have issues depositing their poop.
My parents have related the story of my refusal to poop in the potty many, many times . . . mainly because they thought it was rather funny that I was terrified of my own poop. Maybe that's O's problem, too?
My 2-years-younger sister *I* potty trained. I just told her she stunk, showed her what to do, took the diaper off her and put her in a pair of my undies. In one day, she was completely trained. Let's hope you get lucky like that with your #2 (and 3)!
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